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Mysterious Musings
Madame Athame, CTPHD / ASAP / PDQ
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Madame Athame is a mysterious
will-o-the-wisp who offers tongue-in-cheek readings that are meant to be
taken as such. They are by no means a lesson in how to read the tarot for
real clients.
Warning: If you are humor-impaired, the Reiki Master General
strongly advises you not to read Madame Athame's column.
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Q: Dear Madame Athame,
I'm leaving my marriage, control freak diva of a husband and all. He's
been very useful in many ways, and at one point I believed we were
deliriously in love. However, when a man who professes to adore me, to
worship at my shrine, begins to tell me that I can't party with my pals
until 5 a.m. because I have to give a show the next night, that's the
final straw! Any hope on the horizon, Madame A.?
Hugs 'n' Squeezes,
Larissa Manicotti
A:
My dear Larissa,
Mille grazie for your hugs 'n' squeezes. Huge air-kisses right back at ya.
Honey, another one on the way out? Darlin', we're gonna get you a wash and
wear wedding dress! But I hear you on that crampin' the style thing.
Anyway, here's a little tarot light shed on your marital shift.
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PAST. 5 of Wands.
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In the past, you've
practically had to beat men away with a stick, legions of them. This
card also reflects this past year's marital conflicts. The guys in
the picture can't seem to make the pieces fit together - did hubby
have trouble...er...inserting Tab A into Slot B? |
PRESENT. Emperor.
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You're right -
control freak! Hubby sees you as a commodity, a part of his
"empire". Yuck! However, this card also tells me that you've got
friends in very high places, honey. The Emperor grasps a ball in one
hand - the judge wants your soon-to-be-ex's ****s in a sling! |
FUTURE. Empress.
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My dear, the future
looks great! Thank gods you drew up a pre-nup, 'cause it looks like
you keep the whole enchilada. As an added bonus, there's a lot of
love and you-know-what on the horizon. Note, however, that you may
be repeating your mother's marriage patterns. Perhaps something to
do with men who enjoy your music and put you up on a pedestal.
Sweetie, these are probably not men who are marrying material! |
Best of luck,
Madame Athame
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